Freeballing It

After Britney’s scandalicious vajayjay all’aperto episode, freeballing lost the classiness it once had (think Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct). No comment, except that I empathize with trying to avoid The VPL – Visible Panty Line.

The origins of the word are open to speculation; some say it might refer to being “out in the open” or “ready for action.” It might also be linked with the Scotish heritage of the kilt; the first Commando units were trained in Scotland during WWII. As for the British Forces, ‘going commando’ refers to not washing and lacking hygiene in general (well, more than usual guys do) as Royal Marine Commandos have a reputation when on duty.

Pros: avoids the VPL. Can be very comfortable if you don’t have the bladder of a 68-year-old. Although I doubt that it procures the same type of sexual liberation as the Burn Bras movement. Plus, according to my good friend Wiki, tight underwear decreases sperm count in men. I know you only need one to fill the oven, but don’t let it get to that point!

Cons: Opponents will state health issues – unfounded unless you wear a microskirt in the bus. Also, reasons like ‘If God had wanted men to ‘go commando’ he wouldn’t have invented polycotton with two per cent lycra! When my zip broke once I was glad to have boxers on.’ –Comedian Dave Gorman

Dude, I’m all for tighty whities, but I doubt you have enough clean underwear to last til Mom’s next laundry. And the fact that your zipper broke speaks of more urgent issues than the fabric/colour/tightness of your underwear. The mental picture of a guy in a suit going commando goes further for me. Further as in really far.


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3 Responses to “Freeballing It”

  1. leila Says:

    Yea, I have just one reason for not going bare bottom, SPOTTING. me nightmares just thinking about it:(

  2. lisa Says:

    hmm.. well that little glimpse made Sharon Stone’s career and ruined it for the rest of us i guess!~) Mind you on her worst day, she had more class than Spear,Lohan & company.

  3. Anonymous Says:

    Just what does the spotting business refer to? Yellow or Red? hehe

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