Sexy People in Music

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And no, I don’t mean anyone in the Pussycat Dolls. That’s not music – that’s a couple of prostitutes wearing what can only be described as “used-to-be-clothing” dancing around in a manner that would suggest they hang out on St Catherine way too much. Sexy people in music is more about people whose sexuality is totally enhanced by music. An excellent example of this is Miss Petra the violinist in the Foo Fighters’s latest DVD, Skin and Bones. Not only is the DVD totally fucking awesome (Best of You, Everlong, Razor, Next Year…the list goes on and on), but it also blew my mind the first time I watched it. See, amidst all these ex-grunge-era-turned-full-out-rockers sits a completely unremarkable woman. When you see her before the concert, she doesn’t look particularly good nor bad – she just looks. But, a couple of songs into the concert and I couldn’t help but notice that I kept focusing all my attention on her, rather than the ridiculous antics of Dave Grohl on stage. She was just sitting there so demurely shredding her violin to pieces as she kept up effortlessly with Grohl and Co. And she was hot. Not just good looking, not just interesting, she was blowing my mind. Now, perhaps I’m weird, perhaps I’ve turned into a George-like character and can no longer differentiate between sex and food (or in my case, music), but I think that there’s something else at play here rather than raging hormones. The music totally transformed this previously aforementioned totally bland woman into quite the object of my desire. It could be because she was wearing red in a sea of black and blue. It could also be because she was wearing a foxy dress. And those are all at play here, but the biggest reason, I think, is because she was completely surrounded and involved in music that I loved, so, I just displaced my love for music into my momentary love for her.

I was reading Klosterman IV for the umpteenth time the other day, when I got to the article where he talks about Lez Zeppelin, the all-female Led Zeppelin tribute band. The lead singer, whose name escapes me now, keenly pointed out the psychology behind her band…it was something along the lines of how Jimmy Paige and Robert Plant were always good looking men, and now that they were being played by women, men in the audience could un-repress their sexual feelings for them. This makes total sense to me. A similar thing happens in glam metal – you’ve got men dressed up as women on stage prancing about in hypersexualized moves, tight pants, and heavy make up while threatening to pummel your skull in with their bass lines. There has to be some variety of homoerotic undercurrent at shows like this.

Anyways, back to Miss Petra. After conferring with my girlfriend, she confirms this feeling, but with a guy: apparently John Mayer is ridiculously hot on stage (who knew?), but off stage, he’s just another Joe Dude. So, this phenomenon works both ways, for both sexes. I’m not sure about gay men or women, though…do they get turned on by Jimmy Paige or Bret Michaels? How bout other artists? I’d like to hear from our audience – is there anyone you think is totally smoking on stage, because of their music, not their tiny bra and huge breasts, yet completely boring off stage?

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One Response to “Sexy People in Music”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    Interesting thought, I’ve often wondered about this… Although, I have to say, I’ve seen that DVD and I don’t find Petra very interesting; she looks like a kindergarten teacher in that dress.

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