How About You Stick With What You Know?


I present to you the perfect example of how not to further the productive discourse on sex: men talking for both genders.

Cory Silverburg from attempts to inform me about “Ten Ways to Screw Up Your Sex Life.” Lists in general tend to bother me. They’re trendy and usually present me with nothing inventive. Still, I’m always willing to give them a try as they are popular in publications for a reason: we always get sucked into reading them. So, ten ways to screw up my sex life, eh? $50 says I can name at least 8 of the suggestions. Pay up as I got ’em. Take care of your body? Let your own experience be your guide? Be aware of the risks? Be open to experimentation? Oh, Cory! Where would I be without you?

So here are the two that really burn me. Cory enlightens us on two ideas that are “sure fire ways to not get what you want sexually, and to screw up your sex life something awful.” They are: “grow up, and get serious” and “act like sex is something special.” Now, Mr. Silverman, I know that most men are able to compartmentalize sex. Sex to the majority of men is like a nice steak; really good going down but after it’s done, they’re already thinking about dessert. Women are a different breed. Now ladies, don’t think I’m setting back the “cause” here by applying some form of a double standard. Men and women are different in many ways. Your objections will only cause me to yawn. I have met very few women who are able to have casual sex. Even the ones who make this claim I immediately doubt. Women have an overriding tendency to associate something more to the act of sex. Is it in our natures? Was it nurtured? I don’t really care, but the truth of my experience is it is what it is. When a woman gives over her body, she gives over a hell of a lot more than just an opportunity for “a rollicking good time.” Women are culturally forced to live up to different standards in regards to their reputations. Do I detest the idea that when men sleep around they are called studs and when women sleep around they are called sluts? You bet, but culture hasn’t changed as much as I’m sure many of us would like from those prudish Victorian days.

Maybe one day the majority of women will have the luxury to say “sex isn’t really anything special” and I will believe them with all my heart. Until then, gentleman, speak for yourselves.


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3 Responses to “How About You Stick With What You Know?”

  1. Eddie Says:

    Women use sex to get free dinner all the time… and that doesn’t make them whores. So sex must really be something special. If i had something to offer that would regularly net me a free dinner I’d consider that special. I’m starving.

  2. Kate Says:

    Unfortunate women. Someone should tell them that getting free dinners never have to end with sex.

  3. Sandwich Repairman Says:

    But that would upset the entire premise on which all of dating is fundamentally based!!

    I love willful ignorance.

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